My high school basketball coach often scolded us for making bad passes. To him, a bad pass was any pass that wasn’t caught. As a point guard, I often shouldered the blamed for making a bad pass when I felt like a teammate should have been held responsible for fumbling the catch.
For a while, I was frustrated by the unfair criticism. But gradually I came to understand and appreciate what coach Opitz was saying. It was my responsibility not just to throw a good pass, but to recognize that my teammate was ready to catch the pass before I threw it. I learned, for instance, that I shouldn’t throw a pass to our gangly center when he was running at break-neck speed on a fast break. Chances were good that he wouldn’t catch the ball no matter how perfectly I delivered it to him. And my team would suffer from my decision.
What I learned about passing from coach Opitz applies to my job as a communicator. Communication—like a basketball pass—is only complete when both delivered and received. It’s my responsibility not just to deliver effective communication, but to make sure the person on the other end gets it.
When misunderstandings occur—when messages get lost in translation—it’s easy to blame the other person. My communication was perfectly clear. It was the other guy who didn’t listen, didn’t pay attention, didn’t care. Seth Godin’s blog post today reminded me of what coach Opitz taught me so many years ago: It’s my responsibility.
